113 MPH, Pt 1.

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I don’t condone speeding. It’s really never a good idea. However, I often wonder the fastest people have gone on four wheels. On a public road.

Saturday afternoon in the summer. Nothing to do but play video games, talk on the phone, run around outside, hang out at each others houses. And get bored of it all.

Then the phone rang.

Blood pressure rising. Yes. Excitement. Pavlovian. Phone calls meant excitement. Something was about to change. What could it be? He waited for his parents to answer.

Whenever a girl called the house, his mother would yell it out in a sing-songy manner. It really embarrassed him for some reason. Probably because whoever the young lady on the other end could hear the whole affair and in his mind it killed any chance, however remote, he could have had with her. Teenage social castration. The worst thing imaginable. His mother was simply excited that girls were calling him.

“PhooOOOOOhhhOOOOohhhhoone! Iiiiiiiit’s Miiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!”

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The Flamethrower, Pt. 3

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Read Pt. 1 here and Pt. 2 here.

Brian was letting fourth one more volley when a large green Ford F250 King Cab came roaring into the driveway. The vehicle stopped short, a few feet from Brian, nearly hitting him. Brian’s father’s white knuckles could be seen through the windshield, his mouth making a large ‘O’ shape along with his eyes. Then the yelling began.

At first Brian ignored his father. He continued to shoot flames as though nothing was wrong! Brian’s father rolled the windows down. He screamed.

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The Flamethrower, Pt. 2

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Read Flamethrower, Pt. 1 first.

The flamethrower became the regular topic of lunch discussion. When would they build it? Where would they get the fuel? Siphon it from a car? Would they go to the gas station? Would that look suspicious? Where would they shoot it? Brian’s? Would it even work? How dangerous could it possibly be? What would happen if they got caught?

The other lunch regulars thought the idea ranged from awesome to insane. That meant it was only a matter of time until this incredible and truly unique idea could be born into the universe. Were they the first to think of it? Pioneers!

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The Flamethrower, Pt. 1

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More stories. Totally made up. Pics or it didn’t happen, right? Also, please don’t try this at home. It won’t work out for you. I promise.

There used to be no such thing as the Internet. Well, the Internet had only recently come online for the public at large, but a website for Pepsi doesn’t count.

He’d login to the local BBS with a dial-up modem, usually at night, with a pillow over the modem to muffle the primitive digital screeches. He played door games, posted on forums and downloaded files. Most of those downloads were pictures of bikini girls that were made up of no more than 256 colors. Hot.

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Crack Cocaine

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This story is definitely mature rated. Proceed with caution.

“Going to be a great night. Going to be a great night. Going to be…”

He was prepping himself in the mirror. What a night it could be! Senior year. Going up into the woods. Allegheny. Probably drinking. Girls. Maybe even hot girls. Drinking though, yes. Social lubricant. Alcohol does interesting things to 17 year olds.

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